A Quiet Pain

The manilla envelope came in the mail while I was at work today.  It was nothing unexpected, just the judge's signature on my divorce decree.  A notice that my marriage to Ray is legally over.  I am relieved in an odd way, and glad to be on this side of things, instead of where I was 6 months ago.  Still, there is a quiet pain in my heart.  I think it will be there always.  Probably take it's place alongside the other chronic bits of sadness inside me.  I suspect that I will cry myself to sleep tonight.  I do a lot of that.