The "Christmas Junkie" in me!

Have I mentioned that I call myself a "Christmas Junkie" for good reason?  I love the season.  I was born five days before Christmas, and grew up in a holiday loving family.  I hope to pass on the tradition to my own children.  Of course, Christmas is about the birth of Jesus.  For me, there is a magic about it that you never grow out of.  I love the traditions which surround this time of year.  Great childhood memories of hot cocoa, taking rides to look at lights, making cut-out sugar cookies (with my mom's tin cookie cutters), choosing a tree and spending a whole evening decorating it.  My Grandma always spent Christmas night at our house, and slept with me in my room.  She was worse than any kid, and kept me awake with excitement most of the night.  I remember her whispering  "Did you hear that?  I think there's something on the roof."  This would go on until my Mom would yell from the other room, "Mother, you two go to sleep!"  Then we would giggle and giggle.  What a lovely time those years with my Grandma were, and how warm I still feel when I think of her smile and her laugh.

Now, of course, I love doing all these things with my own family.  My boys are also very traditional about the things we do at this time of year.  They remind me if I forget anything.  And yes, I'm still silly about it, and spend all the time I can doing fun Christmas things.  Merry Christmas to all! 

New Job!

I am so thankful for a large blessing.  I've been applying for other positions at Intermountain Healthcare, with more hours and benefits.  Today I received a job offer, and accepted it!  So I have a new job starting this week.  Well, technically I have another job to add to my collection, but who's counting?  For those of you who are, I now officially have four jobs.  I will only have these four jobs for two weeks, thank goodness.  What a juggling act that will be :)  Three Clinics and the Library.  Anyway, I am celebrating this very good and long awaited change.  My family needed this so much.  More details to come...

Thanksgiving

Fire Dreams
by Carl Sandburg

(Written to be read aloud, if so be, Thanksgiving Day)

I remember here by the fire,
In the flickering reds and saffrons,
They came in a ramshackle tub,
Pilgrims in tall hats,
Pilgrims of iron jaws,
Drifting by weeks on beaten seas,
And the random chapters say
They were glad and sang to God.

And so
Since the iron-jawed men sat down
And said, "Thanks, O God,"
For life and soup and a little less
Than a hobo handout to-day,
Since gray winds blew gray patterns of sleet on Plymouth Rock,
Since the iron-jawed men sang "Thanks, O God,"
You and I, O Child of the West,
Remember more than ever
November and the hunter's moon,
November and the yellow-spotted hills.

And so
In the name of the iron-jawed men
I will stand up and say yes till the finish is come and gone.
God of all broken hearts, empty hands, sleeping soldiers,
God of all star-flung beaches of night sky,
I and my love-child stand up together to-day and sing: "Thanks, O God."



I am thankful today for more things that I can express.  Most of all, I am thankful to a God who even in his greatness, takes the time to listen to me.  I know that his hand is in all things. 

Happy Thanksgiving to all! 

Becoming one of "them"

It is Veterans Day and I am grateful to my loved ones who have served, and all others.  However, I can only be as sincere as my own experiences allow.  I can remember my father's tears for his fallen fellow soldiers, and my mother's tears over friends and boyfriends who didn't make it home, but I didn't suffer through it like they did. 

This has made me think about a topic I need to write about.  We are kind people, most of us humans, and we feel that we have sufficient sympathy for those who suffer.  Yet our understanding is limited to what we have experienced for ourselves.  This is the part that scares me, you know, the part about God giving us trials for our own perfecting.  Sometimes I feel that if I don't have enough empathy for someone else, I will be doomed to experience their trial. 

When I say that God has blessed my life, it is an understatement!  My path has been filled with great parents, friends, and loved ones.  Earthly Angels (and other types) have come to my aid more times than I can recall.  I have a husband who worked for many years to support our family, and three children that I adore.   We have all been touched by many miracles.

I am enduring another type of trial, one that (by my own admission) I would happily take rather than an ill child, the death of a loved one, and some other things I've endured in the past.  This is where my hope exists from day to day.  In that space between the now, and how bad it was then.  I can't tell you how many times a week I say to myself, "It's not as bad as when . . ."  That mantra sort of keeps me going.

Since I was 20 years old, I have had good employment and health benefits.  After marriage, when Dakota was a year old, Ray gained employment at Springville City.  We spent the next 16 years with a comfortable income and great health insurance and benefits.  I always looked around me at those who did not have these things and wondered how they did it.  And admittedly, I judged those whom I should not have judged.

In July of 2010, without warning or compensation of any kind, Ray lost his 15 year job.  Within literally days, life as we knew it was over.  It was probably a tender mercy to me that I did not realize then how devastating this occurence would be to our lives.  We were left without wages, health insurance, benefits, and could not qualify for help.  All that remained was my part-time job at the Library to support us.  We would, over the months, be forced to cash out everything we had worked so hard to gain.  As the days turned into months, and soon into a year, and now even longer, our losses seemed to domino and it was difficult to keep from sinking into despair.

With help from so many, we are still scraping along.  I have gained another part-time job.  It's not enough to pay our bills and we still have no insurance, but I'm so grateful for it.  I have learned to work hours that I never thought I could.  Seven days a week, I keep it up.  I have two of the best bosses anywhere, and unbelievable co-workers.  Without them, I could not make it through the days.  I've come to appreciate all the gift cards, money, candy, and kind encouraging notes that are so often left in my locker at the Library.  Most of all, they keep me smiling and saying "You can do this. Just four more hours." Because, like it or not, I am one of "them" now.  One of those people that I felt so sorry for before this new life.  I understand the exhaustion that often clouds your thinking and makes you forget things.  And the fear that permeates every moment, wondering how to slide through another week, with a roof over your head and food for your family.  Once I thought I understood this, but I didn't.  Now I do!  Will it make me a better person?  I hope so.

Great words

"There is a crack in everything.  That's how the light gets in."

                       ~ Leonard Cohen

Halloween catch up

Carson and Micah grew about 25 pumpkins this year.  A few of them were "giant" pumpkins, and they were very thick and difficult to carve.  They were both really proud of their pumpkin accomplishments.  Some were given away and some were sold, and some stayed here to decorate our house and porch.

For school costumes, as usual, they needed to dress up like a theme they are studying.  Carson was the Greek God Apollo.  His golden sparkly hair didn't show up too well in the photo.  Micah was a lizard (the idea was an Iguana).  He was in the brown clothes, had the green spikey head, and at the last minute decided not to wear his green face make-up.  He looked slightly more punk rocker than Iguana, but oh well, he had a great time.

I fell back to my stand-by witch costume and took Carson and Micah trick or treating.  Carson was a pumpkin and made good use of the green face make-up and hair coloring for a "stem."  Micah was a skeleton again this year.  He loves that costume.  We had a great time!

Micah's Birthday!

Today is my youngest son's birthday.  How many times have I discussed how time flies?  Micah is 9 years old.  There is no way to describe what a joy he is to everyone who knows him.  Like my friends often say, "All Micah has to do is smile."  And what a smile it is!  He is a big athletic boy, with the kindest way and the most tender heart. 

Today he had a great day in school.  His friends wrote about him on a "frog" paper, and said the nicest things.  When he came home, we picked up Papa Murphy's pizza.  That was sooo good.  Then we had the traditional cake and ice cream.  It was a fun family birthday party, and we are so happy to celebrate Micah today.  I love you, Micah!

A photo taken in nursery at church.  Micah was two years old.

With big brother Dakota, around 7 months old.

                                                      And today!  Our big 9 year old boy.